I am unwell at the moment. I have some kind of virus. Or bug. Or infection. It started weeks ago as a cough and has now graduated into a full blown illness. I woke up yesterday with a thumping head, sore throat and aches in parts of my body I didn't know existed.
My little boy, who is four, also has a cough. But he has had his cough on and off since October. The doctor thinks he has mild asthma and has now caught the virus too. He is on two inhalers and a tablet but the cough is still bad. He has been referred to an asthma specialist so we'll see how that goes.
I have been feeling sorry for myself mainly because of the unbearable tiredness. But although I am actually sick, I sometimes feel I am 'sick in the head'. At the end of the day, when I look at the news, I see what real troubles are. I am not in Syria or any of the countries where ordinary people are suffering right now. What they would give to only have a virus to worry about! What they would give to not have to see their family and friends die in front of their eyes. What I am, is one very lucky forty something first time mum with loads of support and privileges!
I have been very moved watching the news lately and very thankful to be in the position that I am in. It made me sad to read about the Journalist Marie Colvin who was killed in Syria this week.http://wafaamrblog.blogspot.com/2012/02/marie-colvin.html. It seems she spent years in various countries highlighting human rights issues and the plight of the ordinary citizen. What a brave woman, writing about things that are both life-threatening and life-saving in this world. And ultimately paying the price by losing her own life.
I know that everything is relative to who and where you are in life but, as they say, it could happen to anyone. None of us are immune to what life can give us.I often think that I am actually very sheltered and live a very blessed life. I just hope that I am appreciating it enough.
I don't have to worry about anything except my immediate and extended family and friends, from the time I get up until the time I sleep. My mother was recently ill but has recovered, and we are all fairly healthy apart from the odd virus! So many people around me are splitting up, losing their jobs and homes, suffering cutbacks and illnesses and I wonder, why, so , far I am escaping it. I hope I am not jinxing myself in saying all this, as life has a way of throwing things at you when you least expect it.
Anyway, I just wanted to say that although I am feeling kind of sorry for myself at the moment, I know I am very blessed. I am going to stop worrying about getting older and getting fatter and various other things. So many people don't get that chance at all. For those of us who are lucky enough to have a family, a roof over our heads, food on the table and enough money to live, we should be so thankful.
But still, if anyone has any remedies or ideas for helping a mucusy cough, sore throat and a general feeling of lethargy, don't be shy to let me know what they are. I am definitely sick in body even if I'm not sure about the head! So far, lettuce, manuka honey, gargling with salt have been suggested on facebook. Click here to see the suggestions so far https://www.facebook.com/permalink.php?story_fbid=3254494919754&id=1188492697 and feel free to leave your own suggestions in the comments below.
Friday, February 24, 2012
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Brave, Mad, Selfish?
I have written about it before but I find myself doing it yet again. Of course, the 'it' is always something that gets into my head, so writing about it here really helps to get it out again.
The other day the 'it' was being harassed by teenagers in the playground as I tried to have fun with my son
http://fortysomethingfirsttimemum.blogspot.com/2012/02/this-isnt-me.html and today the 'it' is me being branded crazy for having a first baby in my forties. This, from someone who had all their children by the time they were twenty five. This person is adamant that her way was the right way, not allowing for circumstances, different strokes for different folks or indeed, fate.
This is where I wrote about it before http://www.thewmparentingconnection.com/2010/06/brave-and-selfish-by-claire-hegarty.html and I still feel the same way. I was delighted to receive so many supportive comments on the subject at the time and I really appreciated reading them. It is even better when someone who has done it a completely different way still is open minded enough to realise that their way is not the only way it should be!
You will better understand where I am coming from if you read this http://flowerpowermom.com/over-40-mom-blogs-from-ireland/ and http://www.inseasonmom.org/FeaturedMom.html
Sometimes, I do wish that I had done things differently. Sometimes, I do wish that I had had children when I was younger. Sometimes, I do wish that my mind was not so set against the idea for so long. But mostly I wish that people who have done things differently didn't feel the need to pass judgement that anything different to what they think about it is so wrong.
I may be a forty five year old first time mother (almost forty six) of a four year old toddler, but I wouldn't have it any other way. In my twenties and for some of my thirties, I was all over the place. I was also working and partying my time away. Now that certainly wouldn't have been the time for me to bring a child into this world. Now I have the privilege of being on a career break and I have time to spend with my child that I wouldn't have had at an earlier age.
I have been called 'crazy' and 'mad' to embark on motherhood in my forties. I don't think that I am either of those things, but maybe, just maybe, there is a grain of truth in that, but only a grain.... a very small grain.....................
What do you think? Am I? Am I?
The other day the 'it' was being harassed by teenagers in the playground as I tried to have fun with my son
http://fortysomethingfirsttimemum.blogspot.com/2012/02/this-isnt-me.html and today the 'it' is me being branded crazy for having a first baby in my forties. This, from someone who had all their children by the time they were twenty five. This person is adamant that her way was the right way, not allowing for circumstances, different strokes for different folks or indeed, fate.
This is where I wrote about it before http://www.thewmparentingconnection.com/2010/06/brave-and-selfish-by-claire-hegarty.html and I still feel the same way. I was delighted to receive so many supportive comments on the subject at the time and I really appreciated reading them. It is even better when someone who has done it a completely different way still is open minded enough to realise that their way is not the only way it should be!
You will better understand where I am coming from if you read this http://flowerpowermom.com/over-40-mom-blogs-from-ireland/ and http://www.inseasonmom.org/FeaturedMom.html
Sometimes, I do wish that I had done things differently. Sometimes, I do wish that I had had children when I was younger. Sometimes, I do wish that my mind was not so set against the idea for so long. But mostly I wish that people who have done things differently didn't feel the need to pass judgement that anything different to what they think about it is so wrong.
I may be a forty five year old first time mother (almost forty six) of a four year old toddler, but I wouldn't have it any other way. In my twenties and for some of my thirties, I was all over the place. I was also working and partying my time away. Now that certainly wouldn't have been the time for me to bring a child into this world. Now I have the privilege of being on a career break and I have time to spend with my child that I wouldn't have had at an earlier age.
I have been called 'crazy' and 'mad' to embark on motherhood in my forties. I don't think that I am either of those things, but maybe, just maybe, there is a grain of truth in that, but only a grain.... a very small grain.....................
What do you think? Am I? Am I?
Saturday, February 11, 2012
This isn't me!
This isn't me! Or at least, it wasn't me!
I am not, or at least, I was not, one of those timid women who cowered in the face of adversity. I have always been able to say what I think and admonish where admonishment was needed. So, I am exasperated at my own behaviour in our local park the other day. Indeed, it has infuriated me so much, that I am still admonishing myself about it!
Let me fill you in on what happened!
I am sitting on the bench, happily watching my little boy mucking around with some other kids on the swings and slides. He is getting mucky as it had been raining earlier and the ground is wet. I just sit there smiling because he is enjoying himself. I exchange the odd pleasantry with another mother. I am enjoying myself too. Then, out of nowhere, our fun is ruined.
Three teenage boys hoist themselves up onto the bigger slide and sit at the top smoking. Our children are playing just underneath as one of the boys flicks his ash down towards them. I am incensed and get up to caution them but they don't care. I ask them politely to move to let the children play and to find somewhere else to hang out. The expletives and obscenities showered upon me are too horrible to repeat. One of them poured a can of lager down the slide and made a rude gesture at me.
The other mother gathered her children and left immediately and, after a little hesitation, I did the same. I did not want my child to witness any more of their vulgarity. And I am ashamed to say, that I was also very scared.
I wish, in that situation, that I had been like I was before I became a mother. Back then, I would have challenged them more. I would have been angrier. I would not have been so scared. I would not have just walked away. But these days, the fear rises inside me like bile, and I worry that I would not be around for my little boy, if something were to happen.
I am a forty something first time mum and I want to be around for my son for as long as I can. This is what motivates me to avoid danger these days. That's what I want to think anyway. My mother says that she feels like this nearly all the time. She thinks the older you get the more vulnerable you get and the more fearful you get.
I would love to know what others think and what others would have done in this situation. Did I do the right thing?
I am not, or at least, I was not, one of those timid women who cowered in the face of adversity. I have always been able to say what I think and admonish where admonishment was needed. So, I am exasperated at my own behaviour in our local park the other day. Indeed, it has infuriated me so much, that I am still admonishing myself about it!
Let me fill you in on what happened!
I am sitting on the bench, happily watching my little boy mucking around with some other kids on the swings and slides. He is getting mucky as it had been raining earlier and the ground is wet. I just sit there smiling because he is enjoying himself. I exchange the odd pleasantry with another mother. I am enjoying myself too. Then, out of nowhere, our fun is ruined.Three teenage boys hoist themselves up onto the bigger slide and sit at the top smoking. Our children are playing just underneath as one of the boys flicks his ash down towards them. I am incensed and get up to caution them but they don't care. I ask them politely to move to let the children play and to find somewhere else to hang out. The expletives and obscenities showered upon me are too horrible to repeat. One of them poured a can of lager down the slide and made a rude gesture at me.
The other mother gathered her children and left immediately and, after a little hesitation, I did the same. I did not want my child to witness any more of their vulgarity. And I am ashamed to say, that I was also very scared.
I wish, in that situation, that I had been like I was before I became a mother. Back then, I would have challenged them more. I would have been angrier. I would not have been so scared. I would not have just walked away. But these days, the fear rises inside me like bile, and I worry that I would not be around for my little boy, if something were to happen.
I am a forty something first time mum and I want to be around for my son for as long as I can. This is what motivates me to avoid danger these days. That's what I want to think anyway. My mother says that she feels like this nearly all the time. She thinks the older you get the more vulnerable you get and the more fearful you get.
I would love to know what others think and what others would have done in this situation. Did I do the right thing?
Sunday, January 22, 2012
It's Happened at Last..... The Icing On The Cake!
Well, it's finally happened to me. I always said if this day ever came I would have truly flipped! In my twenties and thirties, while others of my age were settling down and figuring out what family life was all about, I was working and partying my days away.
As anyone who knows me well will agree, I have never been the most domesticated person. What's more I have never yearned to be. I have always felt that life is too short for housework, baking and even parenting! I saw these things as too mundane, ordinary, and restricting and that terrified me.
So it's ironic now, that even though I came to parenthood late, I find that it is not only the best thing that ever happened to me but I love the way of life!
I admit that I actually get satisfaction from doing housework now. But hey, those who know me needn't worry too much. It's not that fulfilling that I will spend time doing it when something more interesting presents itself! I am still liable to drop everything and worry about it later. Life is still too short to do too much housework! And the older I get the shorter it gets so alternative activities get priority!
The best bit of it all though is sharing time with my four year old son. We do lots of fun things together and I love reliving my childhood with him. He has been pestering me for a while now to bake some cookies and cupcakes or biscuits and fairy cakes as we call them here in Ireland. I have been putting it off for ages because baking is something I never enjoyed as a child and hated even more in domestic science at school. My mother used to get annoyed at the mess and say I had more on the floor than in the bowl. My teacher was an old nun who was very strict and unmotivating. Actually to say I hated baking and cooking is really an understatement.
I have wonderful sisters in laws and a mother in law that can bake anything. I also have a friend who can do the same. They always put me to shame because they bake their kid’s birthday cakes and all the things that go with it. I go to the shop for everything, birthday cake, cupcakes, biscuits, the lot!
However, last week, while out with my cousins, I spotted a cute baking kit and decided to buy it for my little boy. I knew he would love it since he has been pestering me for ages and I thought buying it might finally egg me on. And what do you know, it did. It actually did! I had had conversations with various friends about the fun they have baking with their kids but put it out of my mind. Yet yesterday I found myself in the baking aisle of the supermarket perusing all the things we would need.
Today, my little boy and I made our first batch of cookies and our first batch of fairy/queenie/cupcakes and we couldn't be more thrilled! True, the cupcakes are a little pathetic since some of them haven't risen but hey, it's a first attempt! The cookies are not too bad considering we forgot to add vanilla essence and they could probably do with being sweeter. They do look cute though, cut out into shapes of little men, women and elephants. I really must do something about getting some cat cookie cutters. Now that would please us even more since we are both cat crazy!
I have started to bake. I have started to bake. I have started to bake. I have to keep repeating that as it seems so incredible to me! And even more uncharacteristically, I think I might even have the baking bug. I can't wait to try making banana bread and carrot cake next. Gosh, is that me saying that? It can't be, can it? But, it is..........I am now a fully-fledged domesticated parent. It has finally and unbelievably happened to me! Just have to figure out how to finally put the icing on the cake!
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Enough Trust
Enough Trust
http://www.thewmparentingconnection.com/2011/05/enough-trust.html
My latest post over at the WM Parenting Connection in which I talk about how I hope my son will see me as older and wiser rather than an old fogey! I hope he will be able to trust me enough to confide in me about whatever he is going through in life. All comments welcome.
My latest post over at the WM Parenting Connection in which I talk about how I hope my son will see me as older and wiser rather than an old fogey! I hope he will be able to trust me enough to confide in me about whatever he is going through in life. All comments welcome.
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Oct 15 - International Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day
Yesterday was International Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. I posted about it over at
http://www.thewmparentingconnection.com/2011/10/international-pregnancy-and-infant-loss.html
http://www.thewmparentingconnection.com/2011/10/international-pregnancy-and-infant-loss.html
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